For in him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities;all things have been created through him and for him. – Colossians 1:16
It was just a couple of days ago that I was writing about the fact that God is Still in Control even if we choose not to acknowledge it. He never relinquishes it because he created it. Without God there would be no power, no Earth or Heaven. No us. Sometimes, I lie awake at night and worry about random things that work themselves out because I cannot relax my desire for control on everything yet. I should instead pray about them. God has the authority to make life changing sweeps in anyone’s life even if we do not want them he knows the purpose of those changes and it is scary to think that our ability to control it is zero.
Forgetting Where Power Resides
I think for me it is not necessarily forgetting that God has the power because I know he does. For some reason I think that I am Jacob and that I will prevail. Jacob wrestled with God and would not let the manifestation that God had taken go until he was blessed. While God could have easily beaten Jacob he chose to not use any powers at all until the very end where he injured Jacob’s hip with a single touch. God did bless Jacob and renamed him Israel but there is meaning in this because Jacob had been in exile for 20 years. In that time he matured and became a man of great wisdom. The physical match was a final test for Jacob to prove his sincerity in his change from a sinner to a devoted follower of God. Jacob recognized the power within the man he wrestled and demanded a blessing. He did not forget where power resided but God blessed him for his perseverance (Genesis 32:22-31). Instead of wrestling with God I really should learn to relax, let go and allow His will to guide my life. Jesus has done the work and wrestled with sin. Our desire to control our destiny is a direct conflict of God’s plan often times because we feel that conflict. It is the guilt we experience while sinning.
Control is Scarring
It’s true, for me at least. Learning to give God control can be tiring effort but it is also something that when done well results in scarring. This is not scarring in the physical sense but it transcends that. Elbert Hubbard said it pretty succinctly, “God will not look you over for medals, degrees and diplomas, but for scars.” It doesn’t matter what we achieve in this world physically but how we affect people spiritually. So the scarring is a good thing because it signifies growth much like how a muscle grows. It tears and then new muscle is built in place. If you are moving in your walk with God it is going to be something that hurts but you learn from and grow with so that you are closer to Him.
God is speaking to me directly about this. I was so busy yesterday and I knew that I needed to do my devotional but time was not working to my advantage. I was getting irritated with myself because I wanted to do it but something kept coming up every time. Then the test, I was sitting here writing this at 10:00 PM and was halfway through when my little girl came up to me wanting me to hold her. She had not been feeling well at all. So do I tell her in a minute and have no intention of doing so, it would have been selfish or do I do as she asks me. God was showing me that I do need to relax and that he has it all under control. I did the right thing (right because I don’t feel conflicted) and picked her up and laid on the couch with her. I didn’t get her to bed until a little after midnight. I could have went back to working on it but instead I spent an hour with my love because we cherish the small amount of adult time we get. God wants us to let go and fall in to His hands where He can show us His work. It is perfect and always for our good.